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The one-handed chef

Since the birth of The Flash and the return of TSH to work, I’ve been left with the simple fact that I now need to cook or my family will starve.  It’s a loose-loose situation for all of us as on most evenings, I believe the results of my hard efforts* in the kitchen would led them to opt for starvation.

Now don’t get me wrong. I love, love, love food and I’m a swirler from way back. Planning meals. Love it. Pop the cork on a bottle of wine. Love it. Donna Hay magazine. Love it.  And don’t start me on farmers markets because I bloody love them too. Pour the Shiraz, start the chopping of the fresh herbs and I couldn’t be happier. As long as my husband is the one doing the chopping.

You see, my cooking skills lack any form of technique, discipline and motivation and now with added child, our meals have gone to a firery-chargrilled-bottom-on-our-new-Jamie-Oliver-pan grave. With a newborn strapped to the front of me in a baby-bjorn and a toddler twirling round my feet, I’ve turned into a one-handed chef and as I am already disabled in the kitchen arena, this loss of this limb is having disastrous effects! I need help. Don’t let my family stave! I’m now on the hunt for easy and quick recipes.

Inspired by BabyMac, I encourage you to take Lou Lou’s One-Handed Chef Challenge, the rules are simple: Said meal must be easily assembled or prepared in under 20 minutes and can be done so with only one hand. Each recipe must come with a show pony rating.

Here is my own submission and what I like to call, tonight’s dinner.

Lou Lou’s Lemon-Infused Tuna Pasta.

1. Boil a large pot of water and add any 3 minute pasta you have lying around.

2. Forget to add salt or that it only takes 3 minutes and just let it boil forever.

3. Open a can a tuna.

4. Open a can of corn.

5. Cut up a tomato.

6. Once the pasta is over cooked and sticky, combine all ingredients and toss.

7. Cut up lemon and squeeze over.

8. Miss time the whole thing, have to go and feed the baby for half and hour, then serve cold.

Show pony rating: 3/5 for the words ‘lemon-infused’, sounds so fancy. Can be increased to 4/5 if you change the name to: Tuna Pasta with Lemon jus.

Donate a recipe today!

*This is a falsehood. I don’t even try.

24 Comments Post a comment
  1. Oh… See I live alone so only have me to cook for. I love cooking – for me – but hating cooking for others. (This would possibly change if it was for family, as I’m comfortable cooking for my mother and did so the entire weekend I visited her this past weekend!).

    But… I’m a boring cook and cook the same things ALL of the time. Plus I’m nervouse about trying anything new.

    PS, I’m actually really good at pouring the shiraz etc…

    PPS. Tonight I was supposed to have this tres easy chicken and pepperoni thing (no carbs) but bathed (with champagne) for too long, so cooked scrambled eggs – using the pepperoni – instead.

    It should be said that I am – in fact – a genius.



    PS. I may have missed something (or confused with alcohol-addled mind) but does The Flash have a name as yet…? Or is it like the Danes and the Princess Mary thing of not naming a child until its christening in Sweden as well?!

    September 17, 2012
    • OMG. Having a bath with some bubbly and then choosing the easier, easy cooking option. I think I have just found my mentor.

      I too have my tried and true favourites that I repeat and repeat. Lucky I like them and tough luck to those who complain.

      Yes, the Flash does have a name and I’ve sent it to the tax authorities for approval.Hello, what? Yes mon frere, every Swedish baby’s name has to be approved of by the government to stop people naming their children Apple, Blanket or Ikea.

      September 17, 2012
      • OMG. How bizarre (the registration bit!).


        September 18, 2012
  2. Hold on, you can’t open cans of tuna and corn with only one hand! Cheater! … hehe, just kidding. So where do I submit? Here? ‘Cause I’m all about easy recipes these days!

    September 17, 2012
    • Yes submit here, I knew I could count on you. And yes, cheating is my middle name.

      September 17, 2012
      • Non-fishy salmon cakes to try next after the fish curry 🙂
        1. Preheat oven to 400F
        2. Microwave 1lbs of salmon.
        3. Take salmon meat off of skin. Unless you like the skin or don’t have any skin on them.
        4. Crumble into a bowl. Add mayo (few squirts), salt, pepper, dijon mustard (1 or 2 squirts), half a lemon’s worth of juice, breadcrumbs.
        4. Mix and add ingredients for taste/texture.
        5. Form into 2″ patties.
        6. Put on baking sheet and bake til brown on outside. About 10 min at least.
        7. Enjoy!

        October 3, 2012
      • oooo this sound quick and tasty! Bubba loves salmon so these will absolutely be tried out! Thanks!

        October 4, 2012
  3. kath #

    My Extravagant fish curry
    Challenge accepted !

    500g cheap white fish (chopped or broken into pieces)
    1 onion sliced
    4-5 tomatoes chopped
    1 can coconut milk
    Fill the can with fish stock Stock
    Herbs- 2 tablespoons coriander, 3 teaspoons mustard seeds, 1 teaspoons garam masala, 2 teaspoons turmeric, salt and pepper,

    Put mustard seeds in pan until they start popping, add onion.
    Then add herbs
    Add tomatoes, stir until combined
    Put on enough rice to need the neighbourhood ( i always seem to cook to much)
    Add coconut milk and stock ( simmer for 10 or 15 and go bath one or both kids, making a positive affirmation )
    Add fish 5-8 minutes before eating.

    Show pony rating: 3/5 🙂 i think im being generous !

    September 17, 2012
    • I love it! I think we have all the herbs for this and I’m a fan of cheap fish so I know we have some of that lying around. I love that you can use the can as a measuring device! Saves time but more importantly, saves washing. And getting the kids bathed at the same time as cooking, well that is just my type of multi-tasking recipe.
      And with four types of herbs, it is very much a 3/5! Well done.

      September 17, 2012
    • I totally made this fish dish! It was delicious!!! And when I say I, I mean TSH. But I had a good excuse, I was sick so he took over. Thanks for the recipe!

      October 1, 2012
    • mmmmmmm

      October 3, 2012
  4. Beverly Tengström #

    Hi! I have to share a site that has really good recipes, and most are ready under a half hour — and they are GOOD!
    –and please don’t be put off by Martha Stewart’s reputation for having hard recipes — the everyday food site is tailored for more normal cooking with show pony results!
    Good luck!

    September 18, 2012
    • Oh I am a fan of Martha, we go way back. But of course, it’s been mostly just reading her mag and loving the great photography, her dishes always turn out a bit better than mine. I am going to try her everydayfood, good tip. I’ll give it a go!

      September 18, 2012
  5. i’ve been relegated to cook for the family for the next 2wks since my mom is out partying with her sister who is visiting (my mom lives with us and prefers to cook since she doesn’t like the “non-asian food” i make LOL).

    however, as much as i never liked to cook, i’m actually enjoying it since i discovered some easy recipes that only takes 10mins tops to prep and does most of the cooking in the oven. so it’s sort of like set it and forget it (until the timer goes off and tells me to turn off the oven).

    September 19, 2012
    • Kathy, you are talking my language. 10 minutes to prep and then set and forget. The forgetting part I am good at, lucky we have a firm alarm. Send me over some of those recipes, sound too good to be true.

      I love that your mum is out partying with her sister! and that she busts you for your non-asian food… Good luck for the 2 weeks, but it sounds like you’ve got it all under control…

      September 19, 2012
      • i posted a chicken one on my blog … with pics and everything. no fuss no muss and it tasted delish!

        i’ll email you some recipes.

        September 19, 2012
      • Lovely!

        September 20, 2012
  6. Very impressed about #5. tomato chopping. One handed? Show off. And does your family actually consume tomato? Show off. As you can tell and already know, I have zero recipes or skills to share. But good luck!

    September 20, 2012
  7. Bring me more of these recipes, I need them so I can multitask, cook dinner with one hand and answer emails with the other!!!!!

    September 21, 2012
  8. Poor thing. If i were your neighbor, I’d cook enough food to bring your family something tasty each evening until the baby got a little bigger. Alas, I am not, so I wish you blessings and lots of luck!

    September 30, 2012
    • OMG, that is a great idea! I might start dropping ‘subtle’ suggestions!

      October 1, 2012
      • Amberr Meadows #

        You should!

        October 12, 2012

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